Benoit and I had so much fun taking photos of Gianna for her birth announcement, I just had to share the best results here. We’ve both always had a passion for photography and I’m starting to wonder if I might eventually take the plunge and try to start my own photography business doing maternity, newborn and family portraits. There certainly wouldn’t be very much competition in this area so that makes it a great place to learn and gain experience. Anyway, our little photo shoot was just so much fun! Enjoy the photos.

At the risk of making too much fun of Benoit I couldn’t resist telling the world about his creative lullaby abilities. Last night we were having a particularly difficult time putting Gianna down for her first chunk of sleep but I had fed her, she was wearing a clean diaper and all we had to do was wait for her to get tuckered out. So, I climbed into bed knowing another feeding would be around the corner regardless of whether we put her down in the immediate future. And Benoit plopped himself in the rocking chair with a very tightly swaddled Gianna in his arms.

Now, let me begin by saying neither one of us are particularly gifted in the lullaby singing department. I mean, I can sing but I rarely remember the words to songs let alone the tune. That’s why I do best when singing along with the radio or a cd. I need constant reassurance that I’m on the right verse and that I’m not out of tune. Benoit, on the other hand, barely carries a tune (he mostly whispers in deep baritone murmurs) but he knows far more songs and all their words than I.

So, it was with great surprise last night that I found myself drifting off to sleep to the sound of “Jingle Bells”. It seems, having run out of interesting lullabies, Benoit started in on his repertoire of holiday music, only without the right words and mostly just hummed. I couldn’t help laughing and totally breaking up whatever spell he had cast on the baby with his holiday charm but in hindsight I’m not afraid to admit I might be singing “Oh Christmas Tree” or “Silent Night” when I’ve exhausted my favorites.

So, just so that we don’t run the risk of turning into one of those obnoxious homes where we play Christmas music all year long and start to leave up the decorations because we’re too lazy to take them down…would you please leave a comment here and add to my list of favorite lullabies? I need some new material!

Gianna’s current playlist:

Edelweiss
You are my sunshine
Twinkle Twinkle Little Star
Aloo, Aloo (from my great-grandmother)
Fait do-do
La souris verte

Benoit and I have noticed a new phenomenon of our nightly sleep-deprived routine, a wealth of funny and imagined conversations between us in the dark. I’m convinced it’s not just the lack of sleep but some weird first-time parent syndrome that we’ve discovered. We’ve single-handedly offered the medical community a new and baffling disease that strikes only couples with newborns. Awesome! Maybe I can get my name mentioned in a scholarly journal someday.

The conversations, if you could call our nighttime ramblings that, go something like this at 2am:

Me: (lifting up my shirt) Where’s the baby? She has to finish feeding!
Benoit: (pretending to be awake but really sleeping) I already put her to sleep.
Me: huh?
Benoit: (snoring)
Me: (sitting up in bed but still not turning on the light) Wait! I’m so confused! What happened? Where’s the baby??
Benoit: (hearing my panic) She’s in my arms!
Me: (seeing him rolled on his side and fearing that he’s suffocating her) WHAT?? What are you talking about? Are you sure? I’m SO confused!!
Benoit: (sitting up a little and seeming more alert) Wait. No. She’s in her bassinet.
Me: (completely awake by now and turning on the light) Oh, MY God! (then hysterical laughing & crying at our incompetence as parents)

It takes another 5 minutes or so for Benoit to figure out what has just transpired but eventually he gets that the joke is on us. And then we repeat a version of this kind of conversation every night afterwards and each night it’s new to us. Each night we fight through the same delirium and miscommunication, hallucinations and dream states to make our way to 2am reality, where we eventually find Gianna sleeping peacefully, if a little hungry, in her bassinet.

Sleep never seemed more precious, a commodity to be treasured, a personal resource that once depleted wreaks havoc on all cognitive and emotional fronts. And so it is that I come to write this post, groggy, bleary-eyed, a ghost at my computer. In fact, I wonder if when I have finished I will be able to convince myself in the morning that it was I writing and not some automaton look alike with a full night of sleep under her belt.

Sleep deprivation is listed under one of the sanctioned methods of torture used by most Geneva Convention practicing countries. It’s in the top 5 of preferred tactics by most U.S. generals, I’m sure. Now, I know why. It’s been 2 weeks with Gianna (read: not sleeping) and I think about 13 days ago I was ready to divulge any and all secrets I carry, not that they’re worth much, a spaghetti recipe here, a juicy bit of gossip there. But, I would scream it all from the top of my lungs if someone would grant me just 5 hours of sleep in return. 5 hours! That’s all. I’m not even asking for my pre-baby usual routine of 8-9 hours. I actually feel 5 hours would be just enough to feel like a human being again, just enough to remember what day it is, whether it’s day or night (Gianna sure doesn’t provide me any clues).

So, I may not remember writing this tomorrow…whatever day that may be, but they tell me if I can wait another 2 weeks, maybe, just maybe Gianna will figure out that here on Earth all sane individuals produce melatonin and feel sleepy in the dark. Newborns don’t get a special pass much after that point, cuteness be damned!